Gran and Gramps 50 th wedding anniversary

Grace by Trish

Dear God
We gather here this morning to commemorate this memorable and happy occasion. As we celebrate may we give thanks not only for the gift of food but also for the less tangible things that this occasion represents.
We thank you especially for the love between a husband and wife who cherish and support each other through out the years. We thank you for the satisfaction and joy that comes from nurturing children from adulthood to independence and we thank you for the warmth and fellowship of good friends who enrich our lives.  For your abundant gift of food to nourish our bodies and of love and friendship to enrich our souls, may we be truly grateful.


Graeme's Toast

Ladies and gentlemen

It is my great pleasure to propose the toast today on this very special occasion, the 50 th wedding anniversary of Tony an Dorothy, my grandparents.
Once upon a time, many years ago, a party was held at a house to which lots of teenagers were invited. Now at this party a game was played called “ Murder in The Dark.” All the lights in the house were switched off and the entire place was plunged into darkness and then, while the so called murderer stalked the corridors looking for victims, everyone else ran off shrieking and screaming to try and hide.

Now when the lights were switched on again, two complete strangers who just happen to be the hero and heroine of our story, discovered that they had chosen exactly the same hiding place underneath and old piano. So cramped underneath this thing, they looked across at each other and they were both mutually very impressed with what they saw. She was particularly taken in by his cheery smile and vibrant optimism. He was very smitten indeed by her long, lithe, gorgeous legs which were, he maintained, and he still maintains them to be, the most beautiful legs in all of England.

So our hero and heroine really hit it off from the start and about four years later they were married and the wonderful, inspiring, special thing about this all is, is that 50 years later, half a century later, our fairy tale still continues. Our hero and heroine are still happily married and they are still very much in love with each other and that is what we are here today to celebrate.
Now, granny and grandpa, there is no doubt about it, even after all these years of being married, still have a very, very special relationship and I am sure there are many reasons for this and two of them I suspect are number one; compromise and number two; the fact that they know each other very well.

I discovered this very strong background to their marriage when a little while ago, I went to go and stay with them at their house. One night, all three of us were sitting there watching television and a problem arose commonly known as the clash of the channels. Granny wanted to watch TV 1 and Grandpa wanted to watch the sport on MNet.

So I expected a big argument to ensue and I was most surprised when Grandpa turned to Granny and said “Darling, if you want to watch TV 1, then that is fine. I was very surprised at this compromise. Anyway, five minutes went by and Granny was glued to her TV set and grandpa seemed to make occasional glances across at Gran and I couldn’t understand this. Another five minutes went by and all of a sudden, Granny’s eyelids started to droop. Then her head slowly dropped down onto her chest and before you could say Jack Robinson, she was fast asleep. Now I later discovered she was very accustomed to doing this when in front of the television. Now I’ll never forget it; Grandpa’s face lit up into a mischievous grin and he quietly and stealthily changed the channel with every sign of being a practiced professional, and he lay back into his settee and he said “You know, Graeme, after all these years of being married, I know my darling better than anybody.

Granny and Grandpa are two very, very special people. Granny is simplest the most warm hearted, kindest, giving, inwardly beautiful person in the world and Grandpa, whatever he is doing, whether he is galloping along the bowls green, or telling naughty stories to friends or even doing the morning cross word in the nude for inspiration as he occasionally does, he really loves life and he loves people and wherever he goes, there is laughter and friendship and between the two of them, they are an absolutely unbeatable team.

My sister is in America at the moment and she is not able to be here but she has written a short note which I should quickly like to read. It says “Dear Granny and Grandpa, the other day I read a question. It said “Which person has had the greatest influence on your life?" I didn’t even have to count to three before your names came to me. Granny and grandpa, you have taught me what it means to love and to be open about my affections. You never held back when it came to giving me praise and encouragement and the power to say “I won’t quit”. You have loved me an always want the best for me even when it comes to giving me a gentle push in the right direction. I really thank you for shaping my life so positively during your years in South Africa. You have left me many long lasting and happy memories which I will always look back on with pride and happiness. I am the luckiest person alive to have you as my grandparents. Thank you. Joanne.”

I am sure you will all agree with I say that, granny and grandpa, you are a source of inspiration, love and friendship to us all. We congratulate you on this, your very special day and we wish you many, many more happy days together. Ladies an gentlemen, can I invite you to rise and toast to Tony and Dorothy.

To Tony and Dorothy


Gramp’s reply to the toast


My friends

I put a lot of thought into what I was going to say today and now I am in such a state, I can hardly say anything.

Firstly I must thank Graeme for the beautiful things he said to Dorothy and me and I must also congratulate him on the excellent way in which he proposed the toast.

Everybody in their lives has certain extra special days and I worked out the other night that in my life I have had five extra special days. The first was my 21 st birthday. Now everyone’s 21 st birthday is an extra special day but mine was an extra special day because it was on that day that I proposed to and was accepted by my Dorothy. Extra special day number two was an unmentionable number of years ago when Dorothy presented us with our first daughter, Jill. Now I say unmentionable number of years because I have a shrewd idea that Jill would rather I was not specific. Extra special day number three came an embarrassingly short time after special day number two Dorothy presented me with daughter number two, Trisha, who resides in Canada but, thank God, is here today. Number four of course was our 25 th wedding anniversary and number five is today, the big 50.

Now how do you say thank you to a person who you have shared your life with for 50 years, who has born your children, who has loved and cared for you for 50 years. Now when your first born toddler or your first grandchild staggers up to you on uncertain legs clutching in his hand or her hand a drawing in crayon, utterly indecipherable, but presents it to you with a look of love and a look of pride and you look at this little face and you say “Thank you.” Your heart is filled with love. When an eighteen year old boy, on graduation, gets from his parents his first 2 nd hand motor bike or old banger car, with his face suffused with emotion and gratitude, he looks at his parents and says “Thank you, mum. Thank you dad.” But how do you thank a woman for 50 years of love. A women who has been your wife, your companion, your lover and your friend for 50 years. The words just aren’t there. All you can do is look at her and say “Thank you, darling, for everything.”

Now everyone here I think, except for two, are people who are married or have been married. And I’m not standing here for a minute pretending this has all been Camelot: The sun always shines, it never rains, and everything is always perfect. I’m not because I’ve got to tell you that this beloved girl of mine can be very difficult . She can be very awkward. And like so many women, she is utterly, utterly illogical. And she has that gorgeous feminine habit of never admitting she is wrong. But I have to tell you that on Tuesday of this week, this very week, Dorothy broke into double figures and for the 10 th time in 50 years, she looked at me and said “Darling, I was wrong.” I thought to myself, Xmas has come early this year. And then, as if this wasn’t enough, and I am sure this could only be because she was suffused with the emotion of this imminent occasion, through gritted teeth, she added “And you were right!”

Dorothy and I are so thrilled and grateful that you have honored us with your presence here today. We have here our lovely South African daughter, Jill, and Ivor, her husband, and as you have already heard, our gorgeous grandson, Graeme, who is the apple of our eye. Sadly my beautiful granddaughter, Joanne, is in America and cannot be here but you have heard that lovely message from her and, bless her heart, she rang us today.

We also have here, to put the icing on the cake, our daughter Trish from Vancouver and that really is a Godsend. Unfortunately, her husband Mike, and their two lovely kids, Keira aged 11 and Kyle aged 8, obviously can’t be here. Mike has to earn a living, the kids have to go to school and we can’t afford four return fares from Vancouver!

We are also thrilled that quite by chance, which makes it even more delightful, we have Barbara here who lives in Majorca and she is here with her husband. We have known Barbara for longer than she would like me to mention and it is a thrill that they happen to be here in this country just at this time.

We also welcome all those lovely friends of Jill and Ivor, who, over the 20 years we have been here, visiting and living, have become friends of ours. And lastly, but by no means least, my lovely pals from the Rondebosch Bowls Club. For 10 years nearly, we have been members and they took us into their club and into their hearts, and they have become, outside my family, my life. I can’t tell you the pleasure and the joy that it gives me and Dorothy to have you here today.

Now I’d like to close very briefly, as I started, by talking to Graeme. I’d like to end by giving Graeme one piece of advice. Now at no stage does a 21 year old boy think of being married 50 years himself. But when one day he marries and eventually recalls this lovely day, it might possibly cross his mind “Could I possibly be married for 50 years?”

And you can Graeme, and please God you will, and you have only one thing to do but it is the most difficult thing you could possibly imagine – you have to find and marry a girl as wonderful as my Dorothy.


Gran’s speech

How do I follow that? Or that? All I want to say is that there are good things in life and I was blessed first of all with good health; that is very essential in a happy marriage. And then my second good thing in life was choosing my husband. And I know I made the right choice. I know I am illogical. And I know I am intolerant at times. And I shall still be illogical and intolerant at times. And I am not going to start saying sorry because most times I don’t think I am wrong! And the third thank you is for our lovely daughters. They’ve bought us so much joy and I thank you both very much indeed.

I’ve realised that growing up in any generation, it’s always the same. Whether you’ve chosen the right area to live in to get your children to the right schools, whether they are going to pass exams to go on, what subjects they ought to give up, and then there is the rushing to and fro taking them to guides, the skating, the ballet which they weren’t very good at! And that goes on today, it’s just the same, every generation is the same, it doesn’t alter.

After that, they left home and decided to go overseas. I was very happy about this and thought “What brave girls they are - but I wasn’t at all happy when they let us know that they weren’t coming back because they were going to get married. I cried buckets and Tony had a terrible time.

But then I soon realised how lucky I was that this happened because if they hadn’t done this, we would never have come to South Africa and visited our lovely son in law and grandchildren who have always made us so welcome. We would never have made friends with so many of their friends who have also made us so welcome. And the same goes with Canada. We would never have visited Canada and seen the beauties of that country and met the lovely people there.
So all in all, this life of ours has gone on at a terrific gallop and it gallops along too fast really, but all I want to do today is to thank my family and all our friends, both new and old, for giving us this wonderful opportunity of such a beautiful day.

Speeches


Introduction by Gramps

Grace


My Speech


Gramp's Speech


Gran's Speech