Tribute to Henk

Henk, Antony's dad, passed away over the weekend. He was a very special man who treasured his family above all else. I didn't know him well but I remember him most for warmth and friendliness and smile. Below is a beautiful tribute that Jo has written, to be read out at his memorial service.

Jo's tribute to Henk

Today is a very sad day!  Although we have been expecting this day to come for a while, Henk finally passed away this morning.  He was such a gentle, brave man who fought Alzheimer's for many years.  Even when it was so hard for him to string a whole sentence together, he always would come out with the funniest one liners and make us laugh.

Henk was a true gentleman.  I never heard him say a bad word about anyone.  He was a great hugger and when we went to visit, he always gave you a tight squeeze and made you feel like he was the happiest man in the world to see you.

Henk loved old cars, planes, books and movies about world wars (uncanny how he died on the 70th anniversary of D-Day).  He loved travelling the world and around South Africa in his Sanjong  Musso.  He loved water and swimming and it brought out the fun and youthful side in him.  He would always be the first to jump in the pool and it was always done in style with a 10/10 forward flip.  When he arrived in Plett after the long drive over, he would say to the family "Lets go and wash the Free State dust off".

He loved grapetizer and always ordered the fish on the menu at a restaurant. I remember his love of icecream - but real vanilla, not the sorbet stuff!  Even better if it was smothered in chocolate sauce.  

Henk loved music and especially the song "when I grow to old to dream".  It was a common sight to see him sweep Sheila into a dance in the middle of the lounge.  He would put Jessica onto his lap and while Antony played the organ, Henk would take Jessie's hands and pretend to play the piano with her and then waltz her around the room.

Henk always had a whistle or a hum going and loved to show the kids how to draw aeroplanes or ships.  We were all impressed with his skill.

He loved the outdoors and hiking and nature.  He would take his stick and go up the Contour Path on a regular basis.  I first knew him in his Camps Bay house, and he loved the beach and to go walking along the Sea Point promenade . 

When we asked him how he was when we saw him, his first response was always 'first class' or "A1" Even when he was sick, when he saw Ants or Matt, he would say "hi Buster" or hi "Sonny Boy".

 But the thing that was the most important to him was his family and especially his wife Sheila.  I have never met a couple who doted on each other so much and never left each others sides.  They did everything together and even shared that teeny tiny bed right up to the end.  They shared a love that was so strong and so deep and if any of us can have what they did, we would be truly blessed.

Henk adored his grandchildren.  He loved walking Sam and Matt to the waterfall near to their Camps Bay house and skimming stones into the water.  My kids loved sleep overs at their house and they never left there without getting a chocolate.  I love how after a family meal, Sheila washed and Henk dried and how his garage was so impeccably neat and organized.  If there was any tool you needed, Henk had it.

He was so generous and loved taking the family out for Sunday meals.  In the early days, we would head out and explore different wine farms in the Stellenbosch and Franschoek area.

He was a keen member of the Crank Handle Club and after a Sunday drive with the club, he and Sheila would pop by to Constantia and visit us in his beautifully restored car.  It was a privilege to have him drive the car at my wedding.  Grandpa Tony was the proudest man to be sitting next to me in it but I secretly think he just loved being seen in Henks Bentley.  He kept waving at passers by!  Henk was always punctual and I think I was the only bride who was actually early to her own wedding!

Henk was a man who loved tea as much as I do and it was even better if it slipped down with a marie biscuit!  I remember many afternoons, having a cuppa tea at their Camps Bay house, looking out of the window at their gorgeous view while Henk sat on his favourite chair.

Henk, even though you suffered from Alzheimer's for many years and acutely for the last 3, you never forgot your family.  You knew who everyone was and with a family our size, that is truly remarkable!  

Your legacy will live on in your children and of course, your amazing and talented 8 grandchildren.  You were an inspiration and a true gentleman and your love will never be forgotten..........

Joanne xx

Sam's tribute

I'd like to start off by thanking everyone here for coming and for all the support you have given towards my family during this tough time.

I'm sure most of you had the privilege of meeting my truly amazing grandpa but I'd like to describe and say what I  remember most about him.

1. Adventurous - for all the seas he had sailed, mountains he had conquered and lands he had explored, my grandpa was never a man who would have nothing to do. He would always be hiking, walking or taking my cousins and I to the waterfall near their Campsbay house to skim stones.

2. Artistic - when I was in grade 5 and visited him in hospital, all he wanted was a piece of paper to draw on. I was star struck by his neat, realistic sketches of buildings, ships, aero planes and cartoon characters. I'd ask him to draw me a pirate-ship in my grade 2 school book whenever he came to my school for grandparents day. I would then go around bragging to everyone that my grandpa was the best drawer in the world! Unfortunately I did not inherit his drawing skills.

3. Loving - the one thing my grandpa loved more than life itself, was his family. From his greetings of "hi buster" and "hello there sonny boy", our visits with him were never a disappointment. The stories he read us (almost always about some sort of moving vehicle) to his long stories about The War, he always had something interesting to say. And even though I hated saying goodbye, it is one of my most treasured memories. He would stand with my granny in their drive way waving to us in the car and my brother and I would look out the back window until we couldn't see them anymore.

4. Inspirational - the way my grandpa lived his life to the fullest is something I can only dream of accomplishing. He was one of the kindest people I've met, a true gentleman, and the love he gave and received was priceless.

So grandpa, we will miss you, but this is not goodbye. For you will always live in our hearts, our memories and all things beautiful.

At the funeral